...a walk across the room to share a prayer....

Lord, thank you for trials.  Help me to consider them pure joy.  Thank you that trials are a testing of my faith.  Thank you that trials develop perseverance in me.  Thank you that perseverance will make me mature and complete.  Lord, this trial is developing in me something that I am lacking.  Thank you that this trial is showing me where I need wisdom.  Thank you that this trial is pushing me to ask for wisdom.  Please Lord, give me wisdom each day.  Lord, thank you that this trial is causing my faith and belief in You to grow.  Thank you that this trial is forcing me out of double-mindedness and into single-mindedness.  And this trial can ultimately produce stability in me.  Lord, thankn you that persevering through this trial will bring about blessing in my life.  But if I get out of this trial too soon, it will only be a try.  Help me to endure it until the end.  Thank you that persevering through this trial will bring about the crown of life.  Lord, this trial is bringing out temptation in my life.  This temptation is not from You.  This temptation is from within me.  This trial is bringing out a reaction in my flesh (the temptation).  This temptation is producing a desire in me that will entice me.  If I give in to desire,, it will lead me into sin.  The trial - which comes from You - is revealing the weakness in my flesh (the temptation).  Lord, help me to remember that if I give in to temptation it will robe me of the fullness of life.  Help me not to be deceived.  This trial is a good and perfect gift!  (Look at all the good that it will produce!)  Every good and perfect gift comes from the Father of heavenly lights.  Thank you Lord that you chose me.  Thank you that you chose to give me birth...Thank you that I am the first fruits of your creation.  Thank you that this trial has a purpose in line with your great calling for my life.
                                                      Based on James 1:1-18 and written by Steve Pauls

...a walk across the room to do figure eight's....

Keep your soul at peace.

Some time ago I found myself so worked up and distressed about something I was literally walking through my house in figure eights.  (It is possible to do that in my house!)  Much to my chagrin, I had allowed myself to get offended, troubled and distraught over a situation that left me in a weak and helpless state.  I was half way through another figure eight when God got my attention in a very real and miraculous way.  Without going into every detail of how this happened let me just say that before I sat down to allow God to intervene (and I absolutely KNEW He was going to intervene) I knew that I needed to get a book my husband reads every morning as a short devotional....a book I have never read myself and not one that he has talked to me about much, other than the occasional interesting thought.  I placed the book on my kitchen table face down because I also seemed to know that it was the last page I needed to read.  God REALLY DOES speak to us and lead us by His Spirit communicating with our spirit.  And that is how He led me to the following writing and the Scripture that is is based on.

Imagine my relief as I began to read the words of a seventeenth century writer....that our soul is the centre, habitation and kingdom of God.  Our job is to keep that place clean, quiet, void, and peaceable. Clean from guilt and defects, quiet from fears, void of sinful affections, desires, and thoughts, and peaceable in temptations and tribulations.  I have work to do in order to enter into that place of peace that is really only most comfortable when all is well between my Lord and I.  It is the most blessed state of being.  It is where I am fully satisfied.  He writes "Do not be upset or discouraged if you feel fainthearted, for He will return to quiet you that he may still stir your heart.  Because this divine Lord will fill you and rest in your soul, forming a rich throne of peace.  He does this by means of internal recollection and through his heavenly grace, so that within your own heart, you may look for silence in the tumult, solitude in the crowd, light in darkness, forgetfulness in trials, strength in weakness, courage in fear, resistance in the midst of temptation, peace in war, and quiet in tribulation."

This is the Scripture this writing is based on......

"I pray that out of his glorious riches he may strengthen you with power through his Spirit in your inner being, ¹⁷ so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith. And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, ¹⁸ may have power, together with all the Lord’s holy people, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, ¹⁹ and to know this love that surpasses knowledge—that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God."  Eph. 3:16-19

As I read I felt His strength coursing through my entire being.  I am at a loss for words to describe the feeling of the most incredible outpouring of God's love on me.  All I could do was sit in wonderment and gaze at this writing and thank God that this Spanish priest, Miguel de Molinos was inspired by God on a certain day in the seventeenth century to write words for me to read February 21st, 2013; a message so clearly understood, bringing peace to my soul,  they may as well have been spoken audibly that day by God Himself.

Oh the wonder of it all!

...across the room to share my poem.......

trouble will find us
in this big world
smooth sailing waters
change with the wind
what should I do
where can I go
shaken, incredulous
sad and afraid
then, words about mercies
new every morning
grace sufficient for me
comfort, assurance and trust
lighting up pages
all there for me to see
filling my soul
with comfort and rest
reminding me once again
I will walk and not faint
His burden is light
and JOY is mine once again.

...a walk across the room for a little disturbance....

Disturb Us, Lord - 1577

A Prayer by Francis Drake

Disturb us, Lord, when We are too well pleased with ourselves When our dreams have come true Because we dreamed too little, When we arrived safely Because we sailed too close to the shore. Disturb us, Lord, when With the abundance of things we possess We have lost our thirst For the Waters of Life; Having fallen in love with life, We have ceased to dream of eternity And in our efforts to build a new earth, We have allowed our vision Of the new Heaven to dim. Disturb us, Lord, to dare more boldly, To venture on wider seas Where storms will show your mastery: Where losing sight of land We shall find the stars. We ask you to push back The horizons of our hopes; And to push us in the future In strength, courage, hope, and love.

...across the room into the beauty of my back yard...

My house is quiet. The evergreens in my back yard stand still and the white blanket of snow covering the ground just lies there doing it's thing. A few dollops of snow cling to the colourful red, green and gold swag I hung on one of the patio bistro chairs. The porch swing is empty and still in the middle of the yard. This is the scene I get to see through my patio doors and windows. The view is so incredibly restful I can not even turn on the Christmas music. No camera could capture the peace this yard speaks to me today. I can identify with Fanny in Jane Austen's Mansfield Park when she said "Here's harmony! Here's repose! Here's what may tranquilize every care, and lift the heart to rapture!"

I have to admit my heart has been lifted to rapture this month as I have gazed in wonder at the beauty of the outdoors, especially the fresh blanket of snow as it glistens in the sunlight. It seems I'm being spoken to about peace, quiet and rest this Christmas season. Even the deer I meet as my friend and I go for our morning walks are quiet creatures. As I wrote the last sentence, Buzz, my neighbours very black cat quietly padded across my back yard, stopping long enough to glance at me through the patio doors. Buzz is a peaceful cat who tries his level best to keep out of trouble. See what I mean? Peace.

Sometimes it seems these peaceful moments are created for me and sometimes I get to order my days in a way that brings calm and rest to my very being. Sooner or later though something happens that disturbs that serenity. In the case of my back yard it could be a strong north wind catching that lovely blanket of snow, lifting it up and tossing it against the windows. The trees no longer would be standing still and the swing might begin to creek as it gets tossed back and forth in the wind. I have no control over a disturbance such as this. I can create my own calm space from time to time only to be disrupted for various reasons.

As much as I sometimes enjoy the hustle and bustle of city life I do enjoy the peace and quiet whenever I can get it. I always seem to be very aware though that those moments have time limits attached to them and I never know when the changes will take place.

This got me thinking some deeper thoughts today. Thoughts about the peace that I have deep inside me that has become stable, sure, and permanent. The peace I'm referring to can not be created by us. It has to come from God since He is the Prince of Peace (Isaiah 9:5..."For to us a child is born, to us a son is given; and the government shall be upon his shoulder, and his name shall be called Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace.") The reason I say this peace inside me HAS BECOME stable, sure and permanent is because as I have immersed myself in God's love letter (the Bible) to us and learned to know more about Him and His character...who He really is, my knowledge has increased and along with that my faith and trust in Him. I believe that what He says is true and with that comes that deep settled peace. As I'm learning to trust Him and apply what He teaches I realize that peace abides in my very being. Philippians 4:6-7 "Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made know to God. And the PEACE of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus."

That peace from the PRINCE OF PEACE far surpasses any temporary peaceful place we may find ourselves in and also takes us through all the ups and downs of our lives. It really is true that we don't have to worry or be anxious about anything and if we talk to God about our troubles He will give us a peace that humanly is unexplainable! It guards our hearts and protects our minds in a way that we cannot even understand! May you experience that sure, forever peace in your lives this Christmas Season and throughout the New Year!

...across the room to share another favourite....

OK I really think this would have to be one of Gloria Gaither's most fabulous songs ever written. I heard it sung today and just had to share it with you.

I Then Shall Live Lyrics
Words by Gloria Gaither
Music by Jean Sibelius
FINLANDIA

I then shall live as one who’s been forgiven;
I’ll walk with joy to know my debts are paid.
I know my name is clear before my Father;
I am His child, and I am not afraid.
So greatly pardoned, I’ll forgive my brother,
The law of love I gladly will obey.

I then shall live as one who’s learned compassion;
I’ve been so loved that I’ll risk loving too.
I know how fear builds walls instead of bridges;
I’ll dare to see another’s point of view.
And when relationships demand commitment,
Then I’ll be there to care and follow through.

Your kingdom come around and through and in me;
Your power and glory, let them shine through me;
Your Hallowed name, O may I bear with honor,
And may Your living Kingdom come in me.
The Bread of Life, O may I share with honor,
And may You feed a hungry world through me.
Amen. Amen. Amen.

...across the room to share a song....

A friend forwarded this song to me today and I enjoyed it so much I thought I'ld share it with you!

On My Father's Side

Written by The Village Singers

Just a young boy in the temple one day

Shared with the Doctors, they were so amazed!

Never had they seen one so young speak so swift;

They asked Him many questions, the conversation went like this:

What's your name son?

On my mother's side my name is Jesus

but on my Father's side they call me Emmanuel.

How old are you?

On my mother's side I'm twelve years

but on my Father's side I've just always been.

Where you from?

On my mother's side I'm from Bethlehem

but on my Father's side it's New Jerusalem.

What's your plan?

On my mother's side I'll be crucified

but on my Father's side in three days I'll arise

and I'll sit by my Father's side.

He was the Son of God yet the son of man

And I can't help but wonder how Joseph must have felt

Through an open door that day he heard his son reply

you see I'm the King of Kings that's on my Father's side.

...across the room to share a cup of JOY!

FAMILY.....it seems I'm still basking in the glow of all the family togetherness we experienced this Christmas and so it seems family is on my mind a lot even after all the festivities have ended and we are all back into life in this new year, 2011.

A number of years before my mother passed away she related to me how different her relationships were with each of her children. Each one was unique and equally special. I could tell she enjoyed the variety within her own family unit. This year I realized how true this is in my own life. My relationship with each daughter is different and so it is with my grandbabies, brothers, sisters and in-laws. My relationship with my husband of course is just simply a one of a kind, soaked in love, blast through life!!

Our latest grandbaby Sawyer is a cautious little guy and because we don't see him on any kind of regular basis we have to work our way back into his life each time we see him. Of course he is only ten months old so it is not surprising he didn't remember our first few visits. When I get as close to him as the above picture illustrates, I seem to forever remember the touch of his little hand on my head because it is such a precious moment complete with those baby gurgles and the lovey look in his eyes! His touch is ever so gentle and soft, yet leaves a lasting impression. As I recounted a few of those moments from this Christmas I thought about the way each family member leaves their touch on my life every time I see them. Each relationship is unique and every family member leaves a particular impression on my life.

We were blessed this Christmas to have a number of friends into our home before family arrived. Some were new friends and others were older relationships. Again, both types left their imprints on my life. I know that I probably will not see a few of these people again until next Christmas and others will become closer because of the connection we made. I realized this year that the tradition of sending Christmas greeting cards is dying out somewhat which means that some long distance friendships will end up being just that with little contact during the year. It saddens me a little but at the same time it is difficult to keep up a friendship without any contact.

I have one particular friend whose initial contact with me has left a life long impression on my life. When we first met I knew it would be a lasting friendship. The commitment from this friend was undeniably genuine, real, and solid from the very beginning. In fact, he made me a promise that he would be with me wherever I go and he has never gone back on a promise yet. I have spent hours with this friend throughout my life time and know him quite well by now. I know I can trust him with all my secrets and he knows me so well he can read my thoughts before I even think them! He makes me laugh some days at how well he knows me. Just like any other friendship though, I get out of this friendship what I put into it. When I don't spend time with him I sometimes feel that he has left and when I spend lots of time with him I see him everywhere I go. He reminds me that he is with me in all kinds of ways. The other day when I was looking for him as I was driving he reminded me he was with me when I headed up a hill and the sun suddenly shone on my face! He seemed to say "You're looking for me? HERE I am! I made this thing you know! When you don't see the sun I'm STILL with you. Look up! Look around you, beside you, underneath you, above you and you will see me EVERYWHERE! Look at the person beside you, across the counter from you, in the vehicle behind you. They are mine too and they are your reminder of me!" My Friend is God, Jesus, the Holy Spirit whom God sent to be my constant companion everywhere I go. My Friend is an open book to me. He WANTS me to know Him and has told me all about Himself in a letter to me.....The Bible! It's pages are filled with His wonderful plans for my life because He wants me to be prosperous and successful. In one place He wrote about the Bible "...meditate on it day and night, so that you may be careful to do everything written in it. THEN you will be prosperous and successful!" (...don't be thinking financial prosperity here...there is so much more to life!)

I was telling someone this morning that with a Friend like THAT how could one not be full and overflowing with JOY all the time! Even in tough times and trials of every kind, He is always with me and sees me through every day. His hand is on me all the time! Oh the JOY!!

...across the room to share some insights....

Sometimes when thoughts continue to surface a lot I just have to get them down on paper somewhere and that is one of the reasons for this blog. This topic has been on my mind and I take that as indication that there is someone out there also thinking about these things that may be inspired in some way by reading my thoughts. So here we go again!!

I don't know how many times I have been asked to pray for someone, be there for someone in great distress all the while thinking to myself "if only you would be honest with yourself and God you probably would not be in this place" and yet knowing that if I were to say something like that it would not be received in the spirit I would want to give it. Often these people tell me "I've prayed and prayed and nothing happens. Nothing is going the way it should. Nothing helps!" I have experienced this in my own life too! I have discovered that God requires me to deal with sin in my life if I want to enjoy an intimate relationship with Him.

A devotional I read talked about King David in Psalm 66:18-19 who said...."If I had not confessed the sin in my heart, my Lord would not have listened....." NLT. The article addresses the problem of willful sin in our lives and that a holy God can not disregard that. It is impossible to have a truly intimate relationship with God unless we are willing to be absolutely honest with Him, and pure in our hearts, thoughts, and actions. Sin has to be acknowledged and dealt with if we want God to answer our prayers. He loves us so much and wants to clean us up, forgive us, and enjoy a relationship with us. But as the article stated "God does not wink at sin!" Let us not be deceived into thinking that we can indulge in sin in one area of our life and still have an open honest walk with God.

In order to know what God's standards are we need knowledge which comes from searching the Scriptures..."Rightly dividing the Word of Truth" 2 Tim. 2:15. That means using God's Word as our absolute authority; not what society would like us to believe. God's instructions for us are really straight forward and are not suggestions. He doesn't say "You know people, maybe it's not that nice to commit murder. I wish you wouldn't do it." In Ex. 20:17 He says "You must not murder". God does not say "Aw people, it's probably not that great of an idea to commit adultery unless you just don't get your needs met in your marriage. In that case, well, maybe I could look the other way". He says "You must not commit adultery". That's in Exodus also and of course the Bible is full of God's instructions on how to live and conduct ourselves. I think the amazing thing about God's instructions to us is that He has given them to protect us and to give us the best life possible!

If we are followers of Christ then we have the Holy Spirit in our lives who helps us to understand the Scriptures and apply them to our lives. He will convict us of wrong doing and help us to deal with all of our sin, wipe us clean, and restore us into a clean, pure relationship with God. There is no better place to be than in a right relationship with our Creator!

Be blessed as you allow God to "search me and know my heart, test me and know my anxious thoughts. Point out anything in me that offends you and lead me along the path of everlasting life." Ps. 139:23

....across the room to share deeply.....

King of my life, I crown Thee now,
Thine shall the glory be;
Lest I forget Thy thorn crowned brow,
Lead me to Calvary.

Lest I forget Gethsemane,
Lest I forget Thine agony;
Lest I forget Thy love for me,
Lead me to Calvary.

May I be willing, Lord, to bear
Daily my cross for Thee;
Even Thy cup of grief to share,
Thou hast borne all for me.

THE WAY I SEE IT.....

I was amazed again yesterday when God used a song to bring me to a new place in my life. A place where I have wanted to be for a long time. The life of a follower of Jesus Christ is a journey and on this journey we never totally arrive....until we get to heaven that is. This journey is a sure thing; it is real, ongoing, and it is marked with hills, valleys, meadows, streams, doors, windows, and brick walls! It is a personal journey and we go at our own speed. Jesus NEVER pushes us. If we want to stop for any reason He lets us do that. Meanwhile He patiently waits until we are ready to take His hand and walk with Him again. While we walk He talks to us, listens to us and makes sure that we have everything we need for the journey. If we pick up any baggage along the way He sits down and waits until we are ready to go on without anything that will weigh us down. So this is where I was yesterday and have been for some time. I picked up some stones and found myself facing a brick wall. Jesus was right there. Sitting! He just simply SAT DOWN! And when He decides to sit everything stops! It's not comfortable there. We THINK it is at times, but it's not. We hang on to those stones, feeling the weight of them, the smoothness and in some cases the rough spots. Some even seem to sparkle and almost resemble jewels. They are not jewels though. They are just stones and there are many where those came from. The more we hold them, look at them, the more we want to take them with us but He says "No, they have to stay here. When you put them down we can continue our journey". I had several stones I was carrying. The one I just had not been able to put down was one I named Anger. For some time now, I have been picking that one up again and again. I put it down for a bit but we didn't get far on our journey when I would go back and pick it up again.

The anger. I believe the anger had accumulated over some time. I called it "righteous anger" because people I loved dearly were being hurt and I was going to make sure they would be OK. I did everything I could think of to help but in the end it wasn't enough. There was nothing I could do to change their situation and I felt like a failure. The anger towards those inflicting the pain was overwhelming and all-consuming. And why did God not do something about these people! Why did He allow them to continue inflicting pain? At the very least, could He not just stop them? I saw no reason why He would not want to do something. Shamefully, some of my anger was directed at my Saviour!

As usual, God was concerned about what was going on in MY life and MY relationship with HIM. He wanted to get MY attention and deal with ME. I belong to Him and I was letting this anger come between us. As soon as we let anything come between us and God our relationship suffers. As I said earlier, He sat down and waited for me to decide when I wanted to scale that brick wall! It was up to me. My choice, and yet He was right there all the time. He never once left me alone!

Not surprisingly, I was behind the wheel once again when He got my attention. The car or my motorbike seem to be the places God meets with me when we need to do some serious business. On my way home I heard the song I posted above. Until then I had been deep in thought about what was going on in my life and the anger that just would not dissipate. "KING OF MY LIFE"! Really? How can I let Him be King of my life when I choose to wallow in this state of anger? (Ephesians 4:26 "...and don't sin by letting anger control you" NLT) Had I forgotten that Jesus had suffered and died for ALL my sin? How could I possibly hang on so tightly to this stone of anger that was weighing me down! I poured out my heart to God, admitting my sin and asking for forgiveness. My right hand shot up as I repeated the song "KING OF MY LIFE I CROWN THEE NOW" and sang along in my broken faltering voice from the bottom of my heart, the depths of my very being with tears streaming down my face. I'm a pro at driving and crying by now. I've had lots of practice! My hand removed that "crown" I had placed on my life and put in on the KING of my life where it should have been all along. I repeated that song at least five times before I could sing without the tears streaming down my face. Then I asked Him if I ever pick up another pebble to please remind me of Calvary. Gethsemane...and His love for me!

So much changed for me last night. First of all the headache I had suffered with for days was gone! Praise God! When I woke up this morning I jumped out of bed, wide awake, ready for this new "anger-less" day. I breezed through every situation today that would have angered me yesterday and was actually able to laugh at some of the incompetence of a business we have had to deal with lately that was driving me absolutely nuts. Sin in one area multiplies like crazy. Anger directed at one or two people soon mushrooms into anger at anyone wrecking up your perfect ways and plans. It's like an incurable disease. However, the Great Physician is all about curing these types of diseases in our lives that rob us of the relationship He offers us. "Greater is He that is in me than He that is in the world!" I feel like I've stepped through a door into a brand new room. I can't wait to explore all the treasures waiting for me in this new place!

...across the room to share my reading.....

I am really enjoying the works of Oswald Chambers and the fact that his writing is so closely based on the Scriptures. I just want to share some of my readings this week......I like how He describes our condition and our need: "Sin is a fundamental relationship; it is not a wrong doing, it is wrong BEING, deliberate and emphatic independence of God. Other religions deal with SINS...the Bible alone deals with SIN. The Bible reveals that Jesus took upon Himself the heredity of SIN, not our fleshly sins. Jesus Christ rehabilitated the human race; He put it back to where God designed it to be and ANYONE can enter into union with God on the ground of what Our Lord has done on the Cross."

This week I had a conversation with a young lady who talked about praying the "sinners prayer" as though they are magic words that will set us right with God. We talked about salvation being a matter of the heart. So many people seem to be satisfied that they have "said the sinner's prayer" and yet they wonder why their life seems so empty. God isn't there for them. Faith doesn't work for them. Prayers are never answered the way they want them answered. Nothing works! They don't realize that when their hearts are not right with God nothing will happen. As soon as they turn their eyes off God in an act of disobedience and sin their world becomes dark again. Chambers goes on to say that if there is anything that we have not cleaned up in our lives we will not go any further until we are willing to do what the Holy Spirit reveals to us. If He is convicting us of our habitual lies, deceit, broken promises, willful disobedience, we need to take that step of obedience and clean this stuff up and make right our relationship with Him. Chambers says "obey God in the thing He shows you and ... heaven opens and the profoundest truths of God are your straight away!"

...across the room to clean the other room.....

It all started with the old refrigerator that came with the house we bought. Definitely on it's last leg, we decided it needed to be replaced before we faced coming home from a holiday one day to a stinky food mess! As usual I had my sights set on something that wouldn't quite work in the space the former owners had carved out for the small unit now in distress. Although the house was well looked after we had toyed with the idea of making some changes. Long story short, one idea led to another and before we knew it we found ourselves head first into a total home renovation project! With no prior experience to rely on I found myself having to learn at a seemingly impossible rate how to step into the "project manager" position and how to make me look like I knew what I was doing! Thankfully we survived the grueling year long endurance test and finished within the projected time frame. By that time we were both so finished with making decisions that we decided to take a break from making any additional purchases like furniture and a few other items. The one room that suffered from this decision was my laundry room/office. This room ended up being the junk room. I couldn't decide whether I should allow this room to function as a combination laundry/office or just let it be a laundry room and create a little office niche in another area of the house. One thousand and seven conversations weighing the pros and cons later I decided to combine the two. The past six months have been the most difficult for me as I tried to ignore the mess in that room. However lately I noticed that I was having a terrible time trying to keep the rest of my house organized and tidy when I felt like there was nothing I could do about the mess behind that one door in the house! Finally one day I went to the big city and bought all the units I thought I needed in order to finish this room. Thanks to my handy husband we managed to clean up that mess in just two short days! Miraculously my house seems to have expanded by so much more than that one space. I love to keep the door of my laundry room open now because it doesn't bother me at all to have people see what's inside! It is clean, neat and tidy! I never want to leave folded clothes on my dryer any more. I want to fold them on my new table and put them away! As for the rest of my house.....I have no trouble keeping it clean and tidy any more either. I love to walk from room to room and see that everything is in it's rightful place. Had I known it would make such a huge difference in my life I would have done this LONG AGO!

This experience got me thinking about my life and in particular my relationship with God. Sometimes I let an area of my life get a little messy. I might develop a habit that I know is not good or right in God's eyes but I choose to ignore how it makes me feel because there is a certain pay off, like perhaps instant gratification. If I persist in this sin it won't take long for me to let some other area of my life slide. Suddenly I don't want to hear from God so I slack off on reading His Word or praying. My life becomes messy. I have known God long enough that I just simply cannot tolerate something coming between Him and myself for long. I miss Him so dreadfully and soon I will find myself on my knees asking His forgiveness and help so that I can clean up, dust off that sin and throw open the doors of all the rooms in my heart for Him with nothing around to crowd Him out! What a great place to be. May we all be able to keep the doors of the rooms of our hearts wide open all the time! PEACE!

(notice no clothes on the dryer?)

..across the room to model...

Throughout my life there have always been people that I thought were exemplary human beings. What I admire most in people is real wisdom, humour, dangerous faith, honesty, and a passion for something other than themselves. I can't say that I've ever wanted to be someone other than myself although I have wished for certain characteristics and attributes I have detected in other people that I thought I did not have. Fall seems to be the time of year when there is more time for introspection and assessment of the year up to this point, at least in my life this is so. As I have thought about this year there have been times of doubt and yes, disappointment too about the way my life has progressed. So much has changed for me this year and I keep sensing the need to remind myself that as I review all that has transpired I need to look at everything from the perspective of who I am today, rather than who I was last year. Last year seemed to be a year of tremendous growth for me in many ways. This year feels like a flat line year....I envision a heart monitor! Oswald Chambers refers to our daily living as a workshop. Spending time with God in other words. Allowing the roots of faith to sink deeper and deeper and our trust in Him to flourish. That is the only way we will be able to rise to the occasion when we stare into the face of difficult situations. Or LIFE! This year as I've asked Him to search me, and try me as the Scripture says, I feel as though I've been tried. He has asked me to test the growth from last year. Mostly I feel like I passed the test. I'm more convinced than ever before of who I am in God's eyes, how very much He loves me, cares for me and that He has a special plan for me that keeps unfolding day by day. The exciting news about all of this is that I feel that He is on the verge of pulling this all together for me to see what He's been trying to do in my life this year and new direction as well. It feels confusing and exhilarating all at the same time. I am truly beginning to understand what He means when He says that all things work together for good to those that love Him! He uses all the things of life to bring glory to Himself and WE are part of that! My brain is in overdrive today. What I wanted to say today is that we sometimes tend to look up to people in our lives as our examples but, as Oswald Chambers wrote in one of the articles I read this weekend, God did not give us the example of a good man or a good Christian to model ourselves after. He gave us the example of God Himself "Be ye therefore perfect even as your Father in heaven is perfect" .... love one another as I have loved you. He says that the expression of Christian character is not good doing but God-likeness. I like that! I believe that! I believe he is shaping, molding, and transforming me as I allow Him to complete the work He has begun in me. He is the one I want to grow to be like. He is the one I desire to have other people see through me. Keep transforming me O God!

(I hope that I can continue this post later this fall or winter to share what God has been doing in my life)

...across the room for sustenance!....

A friend of mine recently, in the most nasal voice she could manage, made this comment from the old "Saturday Night Live" programs "There's ALWAYS SOMETHING, isn't there?!"

It seems we can toodle (my spell check wants me to insert noodle in there LOL) merrily along for awhile and then BAMM, something happens that wipes that smug smile off our face, shakes us up for awhile, and stirs up some fear and various other killer emotions. As I was rumbling around the country on my motorbike this summer I was thinking about my own life and how I have changed from panicking every time something happens to experiencing this underlying peace that lets me know that ultimately I do not control my life and those around me and I don't have to take on that responsibility. God reminded me of a scripture verse where He tells us

"Peace I leave with you. MY peace I give to you!"

This is not a peace that we can create for ourselves. It is a gift from God. I realized that day on my bike what a precious gift this is that He gives us.

In Jeremiah 16:16 we read

"Your words are what sustain me. They bring me great joy and are my heart's delight, for I bear your name, O Lord God Almighty."

Just as we need nourishment for our bodies from food to sustain us, the spiritual part of us, our soul needs to be sustained as well.

I read the other day that since our souls were created by the breath of God, it is the Word of God, the Bible which is "God breathed" that sustains our souls. So just as we eat food every day to stay alive, grow strong and healthy, we need to feast on His Words each day to sustain our souls. That way when we face obstacles, hardship, pain and difficulty in our lives, His peace will permeate our very being and keep us in spite of what is happening all around us.

I wrote in my journal one day "What, but total trust and faith in God through our frustrations in life could bring both peace and pain at the same time?! The pain comes from not understanding why things happen in spite of our praying and pleading and the peace comes from trusting God and believing that He is sovereign, in control and is doing what is best."

I want to honour God with my life by sitting at His table and filling up on all the goodness He has prepared for my soul!

...across the room for a GREAT PLAN....

"Go and say to this people: When you hear what I say you will not understand. When you see what I do you will not comprehend. For the hearts of these people are hardened and their ears cannot hear, and they have closed their eyes so their eyes cannot see, and their ears cannot hear, and their hearts cannot understand, and they cannot turn to me and let me heal them." Acts. 28:26,27

Those were the final words from Paul to the Romans before he left them although those words originally were spoken by the Holy Spirit to Isaiah (Isa.6:9-10). Everywhere Paul went he told people about his experience on the road to Damascus and how God changed his heart. He told them that God had a plan for his life before he was even born. And so it is with each of us. God has a good plan for each of our lives. The thing is, it won't just happen like magic. We have to participate in His plan for us with open ears, eyes that look for Truth, and hearts that are receptive to His instructions to us in His Word.

However, just like the people Paul spoke to who refused to believe the words God gave him to encourage them to believe in Him, even today, in spite of all the access we have to Bibles and solid Biblical teaching so many have deliberately closed their ears, hardened their hearts, and focused their eyes on lies instead of truth. Truth is so easily accessible. Inside the pages of God's Word, the Bible, He introduces Himself. He tells us that He knows the plans He has for us. Plans for good and not disaster, to give us a future and a hope. In Jeremiah we read that the Israelites were going to be away from their home for a long time but that God had good plans for them and would bring them back. Still, I'm sure they must have despaired at times during those years and felt pretty hopeless about being away from home for such a long time.

I read today that our sins often make us feel hopeless and despair and sometimes it could even be someone else's sinful decisions or actions that make us feel this way. We can't control other people but often their sins directly affect us. I think in these circumstances we just have to remember and believe that God has a good plan and future for all of us. If you are confused about what that plan for your life is or how to hear from God personally, I would love to pray for you or converse with you.

...across the room to quote Mark Twain...

"Let us live so that when we come to die even the undertaker will be sorry."

Mark Twain

This quote reminded me of my days in the funeral service industry. One of my favourite aspects of my duties as a funeral director was to help families write an obituary. I was always disappointed when they offered to write their own! With experience I developed my own way of getting the information I needed to come up with a write-up that would be honoring to the deceased and a special keep sake for the family. Through family feed back I also realized that this exercise was healing for them as they laughed and cried their way through memories and special events they related to me.

Sometimes of course I was given information that was not conducive to printing in the local newspaper and editing would be necessary. Death can bring to light the most awful truths in a family. Like a secret mistress who suddenly feels she has some rights and needs to participate in the funeral proceedings. I could write a book on the terrible things that people sometimes have to deal with in addition to the loss of their family member!

Thankfully though, the norm was to meet with families who had a good relationship with their loved one. I have always loved biographies and auto biographies so it was just natural for me to listen to families reminisce and talk about their loved one. As they talked I would make notes and ask questions. I preferred to do the write-up after they left the funeral home. It meant that I didn't have to hurry but more importantly, I would usually make an appointment with them to meet at their house so that we could look at it together and I could see where and how they lived. Often by the time I had their stamp of approval to send it to print i would find myself telling them "I really wish I could have known your "loved one"! Many times I just knew I would have enjoyed knowing that person.

Every person has a story to tell. Another aspect of funeral service is to prearrange funerals for people. This is not nearly as intense or sad because nothing has happened yet. There has been no loss. I remember one couple in particular who came to see me in the office to prearrange their funerals. We laughed and talked as we made all the arrangements. Later she told me that when she went home she called her sister and told her "We made our funeral prearrangements today and did we every have a great time! You should go too!" Her sister's response was "You are crazy!"

Often as I heard people's life stories I would tell them "Why have you not written a book about your life!" There are some amazing stories and heroes living right in our neighbourhoods! Do you know your neighbour? Your might be very surprised at their life story! These are the people I got to meet, know and enjoy before their time on earth is up!

Have you ever wondered about your story? Have you ever tried to write your life story or at least a certain aspect of it? It's a great exercise to get it down on paper even if it is just for your own eyes. You may just start dancing for JOY and THANKSGIVING for the life that you have. Or it could help you sort out some of your difficulties if you are experiencing struggles. There's nothing like seeing your life in black and white to gain insight, provide clarity, and pave the way for tomorrow!

....across the room for peace....

"Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts"

WOW! That really caught my attention in church this morning. Can you listen to an entire sermon and hear only one thing? It's happened to me before. Today it was that sentence from the Bible in the book of Colossians 3:15a. What does that mean for us on a day to day basis?

If I could remember to let the peace of Christ rule in my heart in every situation in my life I dare say my life would look very different. For instance.....

*I could forfeit my rights to let the other person feel good about themselves

*Maybe, just maybe I could let that other person learn from their own mistakes instead of trying to correct them

*Rather than looking at a problem as a hazard or an obstacle perhaps I could see it as an opportunity as the pastor mentioned this morning

*I need not take offence at someone talking down to me like they tend to do at a business I frequent in my city

*The words "Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do" could become part of my daily vocabulary

The Christian Motorcycle Association was represented in the church we were at this morning. This organization has come up with a beautiful and very meaningful patch that you get to wear on your jacket or vest if you are a member. However, not just anybody gets to be a member. You have to qualify. They want to be sure that as a member of their Association you are letting the peace of Christ rule your heart in every situation (my interpretation).

How much more so should I then allow the peace of Christ to rule my heart! After all, I belong to the family of God and as a Christian, I'm sporting the seal of the Holy Spirit! Every day, I ask this of my Lord:

"Search me O God, and know my heart

test me and know my anxious thoughts.

See if there is any offensive way in me

and lead me in the way everlasting"

Psalm 139:23,24

"May the Words of my mouth

and the meditation of my heart

be acceptable in Thy sight

O Lord, my Rock and my Redeemer"

Psalm 19:14

Note: We were at Centre Street Church in Calgary this morning but unfortunately I cannot remember the name of the person speaking!

...across the room for a sermon...

I was reminded again yesterday that my God is a God of order. He is not about chaos and confusion. If you have read my last two blogs you will see that I have been through a valley in my life. I have experienced Psalm 23 in a very real way recently. God showed Himself to be faithful and a present help in my time of trouble. He used His Scriptures to lead me through my troubles and also to encourage me. Then on Sunday He used a sermon to put it all into perspective! "Where Is God In My Darkness" was the title of the sermon. I immediately rummaged through my purse for my pen because I knew I was going to hear from God. In our darkness we often don't look for God because we're too busy trying to find our own way. He referred to that period of time as "Pain of life without God". Once a person has known what it is like to have God in one's life there is no satisfaction of life without acknowledging Him. We thirst for that relationship when we allow something to come between us and Him and we are broken because of losing what used to be. Discouragement sets in as well as a sense of isolation because suddenly we feel abandoned even though we are the one that has done the abandoning! We experience an overwhelming sense of helplessness when the pressure of the situation is uninterrupted and we feel lost, as though we're living without any direction. Exhaustion sets in, and I think that could be mental, emotional and physical. We've gone from a spiritual high to a spiritual low because we've pushed God away in a sense and we really feel that distancing. I'm amazed at how just one area of disobedience or sin in our lives will cause us to feel so disconnected from God. I really do not like to go there!

To restore our life with God we have to recognize the problem and admit where we are at. It is good to remember the past experiences with God as they will encourage and strengthen us. We have to make intentional choices like eating, sleeping properly and surrounding ourselves with people who will lift us up instead of drag us down. Committing ourselves to a life of worship and trusting in God who has told us He will never leave us or forsake us will restore our life with God.

If we have ever had a relationship with God and then leave Him out for a period of time we will find that we really miss Him and the only cure for our darkness is to turn back to Him by repenting and accepting His forgiveness and embracing His love and grace.

That's a very abbreviated version of the message in our church on Sunday. I thought it was great! It was for me! Thank you Lord for showing me one more time how intimately you know me, what I need and what is best for me!

...across the room to give thanks....

To the faithful you show yourself faithful; to those with integrity you show integrity. To the pure you show yourself pure, but to the wicked you show yourself hostile. You rescue those who are humble......As for God, his way is perfect. All the Lord's promises prove true.…Psalm 18:25-27,30 NLT

Promises such as the following.....

But when the Holy Spirit controls our lives, he will produce this kind of fruit in us: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control......Galatians 5:22 NLT

....ahhh yes! It is the Holy Spirit inside the life of every devoted Christian that helps us to persevere through those struggles that overwhelm us at times. I don't know why I'm always surprised by God's faithfulness and help to me. I know it comes from Him because I cannot change my heart on my own. It is impossible. I can try to change my mind, my will, my actions but I cannot change my heart. My heart has needed some repair work lately and although I knew that, sometimes I let myself stumble onto a path that feels good to me for awhile and then when I realize that I'm heading into a situation that will cause a mess for me I have a hard time turning back because by now it may be a matter of pride, "justifiable or righteous anger", or just stubborn will! When I get into a situation like that I know that God is very near, I can feel Him close, and I know that He is waiting for me to make my move. It reminds me of when the Israelites saw the Egyptians closing in on them by the Red Sea. They were so scared and crying for God to rescue them. God's answer to them was to "get moving"! Well that's been me this last while. Praying and crying for God to do something. Finally I heard Him "Get Moving Elayne"! That left me with a choice....do what is right, or drown in my sea of frustration. Well, I decided to start moving. Moving to a state of repentance, forgiveness and obedience. Oh what a sweet spot. Humbling , yes, but so very sweet. It brings me right into the arms of Jesus, as close as the air that touches my skin. I just KNOW I'm forgiven, hugged, squeezed, and I feel completely whole again.

Larry Holder wrote this song that describes my grateful heart today.....

You love me as a Father loves His child

Your boundless grace pours out to me;

I am fully reconciled.

Your Spirit calls, and I reply,

"Lord lead me day by day

To know Your perfect will, Your holy Way."

My one desire - to know You in the fullness of Your Grace

To hear "Well done, my precious one"

when we meet face to face

Lord, I aspire to please You in obedience and faith

For You, my God, are worthy of all praise.

Your favor has sustained me all my days

The faithfulness You've shown to me;

Oh, how awesome are Your ways.

My heart cries out; I can't contain

The joy that lives in me,

To know that You give life, abundantly!

As night gives way to morning

I'll arise to meet the dawn

As Your Spirit deep within me

Gives me strength to carry on,

Carry on...

My one desire - to know You in the fullness of Your Grace

To hear "Well done, my precious one"

when we meet face to face

Lord, I aspire to please You in obedience and faith

For You, my God, are worthy of all praise.

My greatest desire in life is to be completely devoted to my God....to passionately worship Him with my life and be totally committed to His will and His way for me.